Now’s the time of year where I stand behind the stranger on my treadmill at the gym (I always have one in particular that I’m loyal to) and say under my breath, “Why don’t you just get off my treadmill now? You know you’re gonna be gone by February 1st anyway.”
Oooh, those New Year’s Resolutioners (NYRs), they make me so mad. How cliché to start a diet on January 1st. And how financially irresponsible to join a gym during the most expensive time of the year. I have an idea; pick another day. Or better yet, pick another resolution.
Some Possible Topics to Tackle:
I will always pick up my trash at the movie theater. I will not be the jerk who says, “But if I throw my popcorn bag away, the movie theater workers will be out of a job.”
Each week I will call a friend I’ve lost touch with and catch up. Or at least email.
I will not go in the express lane at the grocery store if I have more than 15 items.
I will return my grocery cart to the cart corral or even back to the store. (This can coincide with the idea above in a whole “grocery store behavior” themed resolution.)
If I do decide to go on a diet, I will donate all my forbidden food to the homeless.
When I see a tragic story on the news, I will do more than just say, “Aw, too bad.” I’ll help out. Or I’ll at least eat a pickle.
I will always put the trash bag back in the can.
One year I made a NYR to stop sucking my thumb. I know, if you’re old enough to make the NYR, you’re way too old to be sucking your thumb. I was eight.
So if you must make a NYR, just do me a favor and pick something you can stick with. Don’t wimp out after a month. Or even two months. And most importantly, don’t use the treadmill that’s next to the fan. That’s mine.
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
Get off my Treadmill
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5 comments:
NYRs are great. As long as you give up the guilt that can come with. Mine is to become French. Eet ees verry amusant to trry sumsing new, no?
Elsa, I thought of you last night when someone with NINETEEN items was in the 10 and under lane and I just had two bottles of wine. I was so mad. But one of my resolutions was to not drink during the week and we drank both bottles last night... so how am I doing? :)
Good NYR, Dis! At least it's original.
Liz-You are the biggest loser, I am not surprised you can't stick with an NYR :) Although since yesterday was a holiday it wasn't technically "during the week."
True. We'll go with that theory even though I did have to work yesterday. And ours aren't really NYRs... they're more like goals. :)
BTW, I went to the gym today and the parking lot was full. I said to the front desk person, "They're here, aren't they?" and she knew exactly who I meant.
NYRs are the kind of people who buy into the mantra, "New Year, New You!" Why can't it be "Tuesday, New You?"
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