Writinggal's Rules of Romance

Have you ever been to a Valentine’s Day-approved restaurant? You know, the kind that makes you call ahead for reservations? The kind with tablecloths? The kind with superfluous forks?

If you go to one of these on V-day, here’s what you’ll face: hundreds of other couples, trying to be romantic. You’ll sit really close to another pair as they attempt to say meaningful things, force themselves to stare into each others’ eyes and dutifully hold hands across the table. In fact, they’ll be sitting so close to you that you might end up holding their hands too. Now, I ask you, IS THAT ROMANTIC? It’s about as intimate as one of those mass weddings in Central Park (which I saw happen on Will & Grace).

If you want some romance, fun and a good V-day story, try to stick to Writinggal’s restaurant rules:

-Don’t go anywhere that has a waiter

-Don’t go anywhere that requires a reservation (especially the kind where you have to say your last name instead of your first. Frank and I messed this up one time and the host said, “Right this way, Mr. and Mrs. Frank.”)

-If it’s got “specials” it’s not so special

-Basically, if anyone else would think of going there for V-day, you don’t wanna be there.

Now, I’m not against fancy restaurants (although I used to be). I just don’t like them on this particular night. So where will Writinggal spend her V-day? At Cathy’s Wok—the Chinese equivalent to Jason’s Deli! CW has it all: you go through a line, it’s affordable, their food tastes awesome, it’s made with healthy ingredients, they don’t have a liquor license so you it’s BYOB and the best part (are you ready for this?) you get FREE ice cream at the end! Now that’s $16 of pure romance.

Other fine choices:

-Luby’s: A hearty steak dinner on a “platter!”
-Golden Corral: So many different genres of food!
-Taco Cabana: Pink margaritas for lovers!
-TGI Friday’s: Now I know this is a bit fancy and they do have a waiter. But $12.99 for a three-course meal? Remember to wear your Thanksgiving pants!

As for me, I can’t wait for tonight at Cathy’s Wok. We’re gonna bring our own wine (and this time not leave our plastic wine cups behind) and totally pig out. It will probably be pretty empty—as if we rented out the place just for us. No reservations, no tablecloths, no extra forks, no fuss. Yep, it’s gonna be one romantic evening for Mr. and Mrs. Frank.