Why TV Theme Songs Rock

It’s a dying art form. Our kids won’t even know what they are. They’ll watch a re-run of Friends on Nick at Nite one day and say, “Why are Chandler and the gang dancing around a fountain before the show starts? And look at Rachel’s 20th century haircut!”

Yep, the theme song is gradually being eliminated to make room for more commercials. Now they just tease us. They’ll play one chord of the song, slap up a logo from the show and we’re supposed to sing along. I remember the days when the TV theme song was the best part of the show. And with that, I present Writinggal’s TV Theme Songs that Rock:

Growing Pains
Sample: Show me that smile again, show me that smile. Don’t waste another minute on your crying.
Best Part: The end when they all try to form the family photo and somebody comes in late. Is it Mike? Or Carol? If it's Carol she was probably throwing up her food.
Trivia: Did you know Alan Thicke (Dr. Seaver) wrote the theme song plus the Wheel of Fortune theme song and the next one on our list? He gets like $.08 every time they play any of them.

Diff’rent Strokes
Sample: Well the world don’t move to the beat of just one drum. What might be right for you, may not be right for some…Diff’rent Strokes it takes, Diff’rent Strokes it takes…
Best Part: Shots of Arnold before he got weird
Trivia: Yep, Alan Thicke wrote it AND sang it. This guy did more than just counsel three people out of his home office.

Friends
Sample: It’s like you’re always stuck in second gear...when it hasn’t been your day, your week, your month, or even your year…I’ll be there for you
Best Part: Duh. Dancing in the fountain. Oh, and when they turn that random lamp off at the end. Is there an outlet in the fountain?
Trivia: I always feel better about myself when I think, “Oh, they’re always stuck in second gear too…their lives aren’t so great…” And then I remember that they’re fictional and in reality, are all obnoxiously rich and can afford to fly a cupcake First Class in the seat next to them if they wanted to.


That 70’s Show
Sample: Hangin’ out, down the street, the same old thing, we did last week. Not a thing to do but TALK to you, We’re all alright. We’re all alright.
Best Part: “Hello Wisconsin!”
Trivia: Danny Masterson (who plays Hyde) is responsible for yelling out that last line.


Family Ties
Sample: “I bet we’ve been together for a million years…what’ll we do baby without us?”
Best Part: Sha-na-na-na
Trivia: It was Tina Yothers’ (Jennifer Keaton’s) idea to add the “sha-na-na-na” at the end and she later went on to a front a semi-successful rock band. Just kidding. About the sha-na-na AND the semi-successful part.


Facts of Life:
Sample: You take the good, you take the bad, you take ‘em both and there you have the Facts of Life, The Facts of Life.
Best Part: When Mrs. Garrett Chimes in, “When the boys you used to hate you date…”
Trivia: Guess who wrote it. That’s right. I think I owe him like $327 by now. Oh, and I can sing every verse of this theme song from the Molly Ringwald days to the George Clooney days.


Honorable Mentions:
Malcom in the Middle: “You’re not the boss of me now”
Silver Spoons: “Together…we’re gonna find our way…”
Cheers: “…where everybody knows your name…and they’re always glad you came.”
Mary Tyler Moore: “Who can turn the world on with her smile?” Best Part: If you don’t know, you don’t deserve to know.

I got this whole idea after jammin’ to “The Office” theme song four times last night (they had a marathon). I LOVE that song but it’s too hard to write about since it doesn’t have words. But trust me, it rocks. I bet Alan Thicke wrote it.