Tradin' Up

I’m not a snob by any means: I shop at Kohl’s. I refuse to valet park if there are other options and I even fly coach.

But I really am not a fan of garage sales. I don’t like to hold them; I don’t like to attend them. For some reason digging through other people’s junk makes me want to wash my hands OCD-style.

However, a few weeks ago I attended the mother of all garage sales for the sake of an article. It was Canton’s First Monday Trade Days. Now since I’ve sold the rights to that story to a magazine, I can’t tell you about it here. But what I can tell you about is a flea market I visited on that same trip: the West Tawakoni Trade Days. This is what you won’t read in the May issue of Texas Parks and Wildlife magazine:

My assignment was to spend three days in Northeast Texas visiting Canton, two state parks in the area and Terrell. On Friday neighbors Susan and Cul de Sac Carrie and I did the Canton thing. (For those who don’t know it’s like the biggest flea market in the country.) I’ll just say it was nicer than I imagined. Yes, I washed my hands but not vigorously. Frank joined me that evening for the rest of my journey across Northeast Texas.

So on the third day as we were driving out of West Tawakoni we spotted a sign that said “West Tawakoni Trade Days: every Saturday and Sunday.” It was Sunday so Frank said, “Should we go?” And I said, “Yes! This will be great for my story. I can compare it to the Canton Trade Days.”

Oh, but there was no comparison.

These weren’t so much “Trade Days” as much as they were “Let’s-bring-the-contents-of-our-kitchen-junk-drawer-and-try-to-sell-it Days.” It was depressing. Disgusting. Degrading. Here are some of the treasures you could find at the WT Trade Days. (Did ya catch the double entendre acronym?)

Decorative Toilet paper rolls
Used Christmas ornaments
Hangers
Jars with felt appliqués
Week-old Bread
Bags of clothes (Seriously. Fill up a plastic bag for $1. You couldn’t pay me a dollar to haul those clothes away.)
Broken furniture

When it comes to garage sales and flea markets, is there no in-between? I couldn’t afford anything at the Canton Trade Days and I couldn’t afford the diseases I was sure to get at the WT Trade Days!

We only spent about 15 minutes there and I begged Frank to let us leave. He wanted to stay. “Fine,” I told him. “I’ll find the valet guy myself!"

"How much for a half-eaten sandwich?"