Birthday Lines from Grandma

My grandma sends me cards for every occasion and I really look forward to them. Not because it’s full of cash (although it usually does have “a piece of money” as she calls it) but because she really takes the time to pick out the perfect card. And the best part? She goes through the card and underlines certain words or phrases—sometimes ones that seem completely random. Or sometimes she underlines almost the whole thing. I can just imagine her sitting at her kitchen counter, strategically underlining words.

When I read the cards out loud to Frank I emphasize the underlined words. Here’s her card for my 30th birthday and remember to raise your voice a little on the underlined parts:


Thinking about you, Grandaughter,
About your smile and laughter, too,
All the terrific things which are
a special part of you…
And hoping today will be the kind
you’re so deserving of
A day that’s filled with happiness
With good times and with love!

My piece of money was $30 (in the form of a $10 and a $20). So as a bonus, my rhyming grandma also included a little poem:

When two bills equal your birthday age
You’ve hit that special birthday gauge
It’ll not happen again you know
Until you hit the Big 4 0!

Of course, numbers-man Frank had to go and spoil it by saying, “That’s not true. When you’re 21 you could have a twenty dollar bill and a one dollar bill and when you’re 25…”

“But still, she’s right that it won’t happen again until I’m 40, okay?! Geez, give the old lady a break!” I barked.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to give you a hard time,” he said.

"Um, I was referring to my grandma…"

Guys in their twenties have a lot to learn.